Thursday, August 19, 2010

Excellent Self Help Marriage Tips.

By Areelitaha Joahlanski

Recognise problems exist- The first step to solving marital problems is to recognise that there are actually problems in the relationship. An endless list of excellent self help marriage tips are available to pick and choose once your know what the exact problems are at "Save My Marriage Today" www.savemymarriagetoday.com. Once problems are identified couples should try as hard as they possibly can to be objective about the troubles, no matter how hopeless or frustrated they feel. Lack of endurance and denial of the problems will lead to the problems increasing and breeding until they are out of control.

When will you need a counsellor?- It is imperative to rather seek the assistance of a counsellor sooner rather than later. If the couples show any blame-shifting or denial behaviour as well as problems in the general household with conflict management and resolution, a counsellor should be the first person to call.

Objective opinions- The counsellor you choose need not be a professional such as a Psychologist or Minister. The only pre-requisite be that the person be objective in his or her feelings towards both spouses as well as in opinion. It is also recommended that the person be a good listener and trustworthy. You will get more counsellor tips at "Save My Marriage Today" www.savemymarriagetoday.com You don't want your very intimate business spread through the family or neighbourhood. Older married couples make excellent counsellors due to the fact that they have probably gone through and seen most of the issues the couples are facing.

Pro's and Con's- We are not all, just bad. No matter how bad or unhappy the spot you've hit in your marriage there are always more advantages and positive things to your partner or the marriage self that con's or negatives. Draw up a list and you will see the positives are a whole lot more than the negatives.

Speak your mind and hear- Lack of proper communication between couples is the biggest pitfall in marriages and even in marriage counselling. Speak your mind and heart on matters you feel unhappy or sad about. By suppressing feelings and emotions of hurt and disappointment you will just prevent healing and happiness in your life. Speak out about feelings, emotions, fears and expectations you have for your marriage. Misunderstandings are easily avoidable by merely communicating with your partner.

Spend time alone as well as together- Isolation is often very important for self-reflection and for hearts to grow fond again. Spend just enough time apart to appreciate one another again. On the other hand, in these fast paced times couples spend more time apart than together. This can cause couples to drift apart or totally loose touch with the one they love. Make time for each other even if it is by appointment for dinner or a holiday. It is very important to enjoy times spent together and to avoid depressing, sad or frustrating subjects that have the potential of spoiling the special mood. Find more great tips to save your marriage at "Save My Marriage Today".

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