Jarod was a client who was done with it and ready to leave his wife. "My wife Christina really does hate sex," he told us. "At least since our kids were born. Is there any way you can help me so I want to save this marriage instead of hitting the road?"
Christina, at Jarod's urging, came to see us as well. "I love Jarod but I can't stand his touching me," she said. "I know he's ready to leave, but if it means that I have to put up with his sexual stuff, I don't care if we save this marriage or not."
If sex disgusts you - if it's a bother - or a waste of time - or it hurts - or is repulsive - or makes you feel dirty - or used - or you never experience pleasure from it...you need to realize that your reactions are not normal. This is a very common problem that women women suffer through at the expense of their relationships. The thing to remember is that people don't start thinking or acting a certain way for no reason. If you think you've gone through all the causes, forward and backward, and have come to the conclusion that sex is still all the things we mentioned above, don't pass on this yet. You may have missed that one ingredient that will make a difference in your life.
There always is a cause behind an emotion, a feeling, or a behavior. If you think you've gone through all the causes, forward and backward, and have come to the conclusion that sex is still all the things we mentioned above, don't pass on this yet. You may have missed that one ingredient that will make a difference in your life.
So why bother? Because the sexual union between a man and a woman is ordained by God and, if it's in the right context, is blessed and pleasurable. God designed it to bind a man and woman together physically and unite their souls.
There's a scientific side, too. When two people engage in sex, two of the neurochemicals that are released are vasopressin and oxytocin. These two chemicals interact with one small but very important part of the brain that is not activated by any other emotion. This area of the brain is the same one that generates the euphoria induced by drugs - like cocaine, for example. Love, in other words, uses the same brain mechanisms that are used during the process of addiction.
You're missing out on one of the wonderful experiences of life that no woman should be without, if you reject lovemaking. Making love should be a delight to you, as well as your guy, and though it may surprise you, most men don't really enjoy sex unless their wives are enjoying it, too. Having an orgasm starts to mean nothing to man who cannot please his partner. It becomes significantly less fun for him too. When we talk with a woman who doesn't enjoy her sexual relationship with her husband, we uncover a number of reasons. These are three of the most common reasons:
What are we trying to say? Only that sex is important to all of us on a number of levels: emotional, psychological and physical; and is the chemical glue that cements a relationship.
* Her religious beliefs tell her to believe that the Bible denounces sex as dirty and shameful, and that having a child as the result is the only purpose. The Bible teaches no such thing. The bible actually teaches just the opposite.
* Your husband has never learned how to make love so it is a pleasure to you. Forever My Love and Keep Love Exciting and Lasting were written with these men in mind.
* Your husband has never learned how to make love so it is a pleasure to you. We wrote Forever My Love and Keep Love Exciting and Lasting with men in mind.
Our counseling experience has exposed these reasons and even more. If you treasure your marriage and want to save it, find out why you don't enjoy sex with your guy and then determine to do everything you can to change the circumstances. We wrote all of the related information on www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com knowing that stability and love are the foundations for intimacy.
Your goal will be to like - adore - cherish lovemaking - not dislike or just tolerate it. Unless you make a conscious effort to change this attitude you may lose your marriage as a result. Save your marriage - start on it today.
Margaret Hardisty International Best Selling Author and Speaker Dr. Vance Hardisty International Speaker and Author Love Relationship Headquarters www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com
Christina, at Jarod's urging, came to see us as well. "I love Jarod but I can't stand his touching me," she said. "I know he's ready to leave, but if it means that I have to put up with his sexual stuff, I don't care if we save this marriage or not."
If sex disgusts you - if it's a bother - or a waste of time - or it hurts - or is repulsive - or makes you feel dirty - or used - or you never experience pleasure from it...you need to realize that your reactions are not normal. This is a very common problem that women women suffer through at the expense of their relationships. The thing to remember is that people don't start thinking or acting a certain way for no reason. If you think you've gone through all the causes, forward and backward, and have come to the conclusion that sex is still all the things we mentioned above, don't pass on this yet. You may have missed that one ingredient that will make a difference in your life.
There always is a cause behind an emotion, a feeling, or a behavior. If you think you've gone through all the causes, forward and backward, and have come to the conclusion that sex is still all the things we mentioned above, don't pass on this yet. You may have missed that one ingredient that will make a difference in your life.
So why bother? Because the sexual union between a man and a woman is ordained by God and, if it's in the right context, is blessed and pleasurable. God designed it to bind a man and woman together physically and unite their souls.
There's a scientific side, too. When two people engage in sex, two of the neurochemicals that are released are vasopressin and oxytocin. These two chemicals interact with one small but very important part of the brain that is not activated by any other emotion. This area of the brain is the same one that generates the euphoria induced by drugs - like cocaine, for example. Love, in other words, uses the same brain mechanisms that are used during the process of addiction.
You're missing out on one of the wonderful experiences of life that no woman should be without, if you reject lovemaking. Making love should be a delight to you, as well as your guy, and though it may surprise you, most men don't really enjoy sex unless their wives are enjoying it, too. Having an orgasm starts to mean nothing to man who cannot please his partner. It becomes significantly less fun for him too. When we talk with a woman who doesn't enjoy her sexual relationship with her husband, we uncover a number of reasons. These are three of the most common reasons:
What are we trying to say? Only that sex is important to all of us on a number of levels: emotional, psychological and physical; and is the chemical glue that cements a relationship.
* Her religious beliefs tell her to believe that the Bible denounces sex as dirty and shameful, and that having a child as the result is the only purpose. The Bible teaches no such thing. The bible actually teaches just the opposite.
* Your husband has never learned how to make love so it is a pleasure to you. Forever My Love and Keep Love Exciting and Lasting were written with these men in mind.
* Your husband has never learned how to make love so it is a pleasure to you. We wrote Forever My Love and Keep Love Exciting and Lasting with men in mind.
Our counseling experience has exposed these reasons and even more. If you treasure your marriage and want to save it, find out why you don't enjoy sex with your guy and then determine to do everything you can to change the circumstances. We wrote all of the related information on www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com knowing that stability and love are the foundations for intimacy.
Your goal will be to like - adore - cherish lovemaking - not dislike or just tolerate it. Unless you make a conscious effort to change this attitude you may lose your marriage as a result. Save your marriage - start on it today.
Margaret Hardisty International Best Selling Author and Speaker Dr. Vance Hardisty International Speaker and Author Love Relationship Headquarters www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com
About the Author:
Do you have marriage problems? You are not alone. 100's of thousands have used our marriage advice. Marriage help is available , and get separate help for women This article, What About When A Wife Hates Sex, Can You Save The Marriage? has free reprint rights.
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